Weight: One Black Woman’s story

I have to say that the subject of body image is a very touchy topic for millions of people everyday but I was relieved in a way to be able to share my story, anonymous or not. I am a thirty-two year old black woman who has suffered weight issues as far as I can remember.  Food was used as a comfort; it was my only friend in so many stressful and depressing times.

First let me say, though, I was HUGELY surprised that white women think black women have it easier when it comes to weight and body image!!!! WOW! I would really beg to differ because I look at certain movies that are made i.e. Shallow Hal verses Norbit. In Shallow Hal the man was made to see the beauty in women no matter what their size. In Norbit (which I loathe to this day) the audience was able to further feed into negative stereotypes about black women who are overweight. The white overweight woman was made to be beautiful, calm, loyal and friendly, while yet again the overweight black women was made to be ignorant, vulgar and alas, loud. So sad…I can’t stomach these kinds of movies, especially where the black woman with a little more plump is made to play what I like to call the fat person. All she talks about is food, eating and being fat. WE ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT!

I would sooo much like to have a husband and family. I’m an aspiring actress (which took me years to tell anyone that’s what I wanted to be) but feel if I don’t lose the weight I’ll be typecast. It’s hard to lose weight because in my mind I’m just not ready and not motivated. Family doesn’t always help, which is why I started gaining the weight in the first place. I used to wear baggy clothes, not wash—anything so as to not be noticed, even though I sank into a deep depression.

I’m much better now because Yahweh has helped me realize how beautiful I am. Do I feel that way everyday? No but it’s a slow process that took years of doing. I have tried to overeat myself to death and ended up in the hospital. I was literally A MESS!

TV doesn’t help. It seems like all the actresses are getting smaller and smaller. There’s so much, I can’t even begin or end. This world is made up of appearances. Beyonce makes it so a man expects a high standard of a woman they will never achieve. Why must we be half-naked to show that women are beautiful? And how did we dub her the spokesperson for ALL the images of black women?

Body image is something I deal with everyday but with God on my side, I will conquer this  demon and this too shall pass like everything else that was or is a hindrance to me and my walk with God.

Submit your story here: http://arkstories.com/bodyimageblog.html

Copyright Ark Stories 2011


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